


and maybe in the end you'll love me again

by jjprise



Category: GOT7, JJ Project
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Family Problems, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Mostly Fluff, Non Idol AU, adding as i go because i don't know where the hell this story is going if i'm being honest, some angst if you squint
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-26
Updated: 2016-06-06
Packaged: 2018-06-06 22:17:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 11,368
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6772498
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jjprise/pseuds/jjprise
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>soulmate au where jaebum and jinyoung are tied together with the invisible red string of fate and are therefore soulmates, but only jinyoung knows. and jaebum's getting married too so several complications will ensue. loosely based off the classic chick flick my best friend's wedding but mostly inspired by this one prompt i read off tumblr.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

_SIXTEEN YEARS AGO_

Jinyoung wasn’t expecting to see the other end of the thin, red thread looped around his left ankle for a very, very long time.

Every time he’d talk about it with his mom—the only other person he knew who could see them—she’d always say it would probably reel him towards a girl when he’s much older, preferably with soft eyes and a smile that reminded him of the sun, but most importantly, a girl. He was too young to notice the heteronormativity laced in her sentences, so shortly afterwards, he’d demand her to retell the story of how the string at her foot led her to her soulmate, who was usually listening from his spot in the living room as he sipped on coffee. He was twenty-five then, based in Mainland China during the time, and she was three years younger and living in Changwon, but the universe decided to work its magic and let them fall into each other’s arms about three years before Jinyoung was brought into the world.

Which is why, you could just imagine his surprise that one Tuesday morning he found it tied to the right ankle of a boy he went to school with.

It was snack time then, and Jinyoung had gotten around to hanging out by his usual spot under the old oak tree, where virtually nobody else could find him: it was kind of like being stuck in a closet in a game of hide and seek during a children's party and everyone forgetting he was missing. Fine by him though, as no one ever really liked him for some reason far beyond his concern. Girls stayed away from him at all costs after a newfound discovery (that is yet to be proven) that all boys had the cooties, while boys picked him up by the collar and demanded for his pocket money.

He unpacked the food his mom had so dutifully made for him. His eomma can't cook to save her life, and both of them know it, but she loves him so much and vice versa that she gets up every morning to prepare the usual rice wrapped in seaweed and deep fried for no apparent reason while he downs it like the obedient son he is. Everything is just fine that way. Well, okay, not fine, but normal. The routine he has been living with for the past few months and sees himself doing so for the rest of the academic year.

Until, he heard something splashing behind him, which is pretty much when everything goes to shit.

He's never had anyone in the same vicinity as him during break time. Jinyoung tried to rack through his head for a memory that could prove his claims wrong, but none surface. Maybe it's just the gardener, he mutters to comfort himself. Maybe he's just watering the plants, that's his job and this could be his working hours. It's way better than admitting it could be a ghost behind all this, seeing as he is also the biggest crybaby known to man.

He packed up his knapsack quickly, holding it desperately under his right arm and let the curiosity get the better of him as he turned around only to see a bright flash of red thread tied to the ankle jutting out from behind the tree...that was eerily connected to his.

"AHHHHH!" The scream that's threatening to damage his eardrums makes Jinyoung a bit slow on the events to follow. All of a sudden, there's a screaming boy in front of him who has many things worth taking note of, his penis being out on full display landing itself on the very top of the list.

Jinyoung is taken aback by everything that he can't help but let out a scream himself, until it's become a very laughable spectacle of two school boys yelling at each other's faces. The next few sentences that escape his mouth are a myriad of questions: "Who are you? Why are your pants unzipped? Have you been following me? Why are your pants unzipped?" The instinct kicks in awfully late, and it is only then when he brings himself to cover his eyes.

It's when he hears the sound of bottoms being re-fastened and a shy "Mianhae" that he opens his eyes again to reveal the person who was lurking behind him. For starters, there is nothing normal about him. He's awfully tall for someone who's only supposed to be a grade level above him. (The patch on his left breast pocket reading "2" is hardly reliable at this point.) Add to that the fact that he's sporting what is quite probably the worst haircut Jinyoung has ever laid his eyes on: like someone took a swig of soju before cutting around the ends of his bangs, all frayed and crooked. But he can't miss the twinkle in the boy's eyes that has enough light to last him at least twenty four hours in a dark forest, the way he juts his bottom lip ever so slightly...and the thread in plain sight, but of course completely oblivious to the other boy.

 _How could it be, when boys are only ever supposed to be with girls like his eomma said?_

"I'm sorry that I screamed. I just got scared." The boy said flatly. He later on extended his hand as a form of introduction. "I'm Im Jaebum."

Jinyoung would normally not want to touch the hand of someone he just caught holding on his willy while peeing, but the rational part of his brain isn't thinking straight at the moment (all it sees is the thread, the red fucking thread meant for his soulmate) and shakes it firmly instead. "I'm Park Jinyoung."

Jaebum immediately retracted his hand upon remembering that he hasn't washed, and murmured a quick apology again for doing something he feels was so inappropriate in front of a single person who was of the same gender anyway. This only leaves the younger one in a fit of restrained laughter. "Why did you have to pee here, of all places?"

"I'm a new student," he replied with a shrug. "I still don't know where the bathroom is and I'm a little bit too shy to ask, but I really needed to pee. I'm sorry if I got your secret hiding place wet." Jaebum has this habit of sticking his tongue in his cheek, Jinyoung makes a mental note: the first of many to come. He also likes apologizing for the smallest things.

"How did you know this was my secret hiding place?" Jinyoung asked, crossing his arms playfully with the intention to intimidate despite being a good year younger and head shorter than the one present in front of him. It sends a flush down Jaebum's face like it does with anyone else. His mom doesn't call him Grumpy Cat for no reason, after all.

"I, uhh, I was just... uhh, y'know uh--"

_Jaebum fiddles with his fingers when he's thinking of excuses.  
Jaebum stutters and talks over his own words._

One mental note after another, clicking away and typing themselves into Jinyoung's precious little head like a typewriter on auto-pilot.

"I saw you alone once here, when I was on my way to the cafeteria, and I wanted to be your friend."

Jinyoung feels like the angels just cracked the sky open and filled the atmosphere with their melodic songs of joy. He's never had anyone want to be his friend before, as previously explained: what more this boy who's so charmingly shy, who could actually be his soulmate even if 1 (being, his soulmate should be a girl) and 1 (being, Jaebum is a boy) equals fish.

"You do?" he said shrilly, which he can see makes Jaebum's expression contort into one of surprise. He instantly changes his voice back to its normal pitch, afraid that it might drive his newfound friend away.

The other nodded his head slowly and a smile spreads across the younger one's face that's so wide he can't feel his jaw. He pats the space next to him for his new friend to sit on, and offers half of his seaweed roll, which taste actually seems a lot more bearable than he remembers.

\--

"Eomma, can your soulmate be a guy?" Jinyoung asked during dinner that night. He had been thinking of other ways, any way that he could bring it up and decided to just spit it out like he did when the mouthwash she made him gargle at night burned the insides of his mouth.

His mom and dad both choked on the ramen they were trying to eat that night. Definitely not a good sign.

Once the inhumane noises had died down, she rested a comforting hand on his shoulder, but he couldn't miss the disgusted expression that had spread across her face. "Where did that question suddenly come from, Jinyoungie?"

"I was having snacks a while ago, then I saw a boy! He was peeing behind me, and it was so funny because we screamed at each other since we were both so surprised. But anyway, I looked at his ankle and it had the red thread! It was connected to mine, Eomma!" The enthusiasm in his voice was genuine, it would be absurd to just shrug it off. But maybe Jinyoung's parents were masters of doing the impossible as it only brought them great dismay.

His father slammed his fist down the table, a first for the usually calm and collected man. "See! This is what you get for poisoning his head with stories about soulmates! I don't need a homosexual for a son!" He spoons whatever is left of his dinner into his mouth, and storms off with the day's edition of the newspaper in hand. All his movements on the way out were punctured with loud, defiant noises, as if he really wants to make his anger known.

Jinyoung was left confused, both about why he suddenly burst in anger and what a homosexual actually is. He turns to his mother, hopefully to gain a bit of enlightenment, but she seems just as dismayed as his father was, only she was better at hiding it. The words that come next are cold as ice, leaving chills down his spine. "Park Jinyoung. Don't you ever ask that kind of question again, do you understand?"

He's never been called by his full name, and spoken to with such a harsh tone. This wasn't the warm, welcoming mother he had grown so accustomed to having around: this was a cold, disappointed woman who was reacting like she had been told the worst insult of her life by her only son.

Before he could even think of an answer, she presses on, this time with more orders. "Stay away from that boy you just told us about. He is not your soulmate: you are meant to be with a girl, so as of now, these are all just tricks being played by your head. You will find her someday, and you will love her and have a family with her and bring us great pride and joy." The fear in his eyes glints so brightly anyone with a working pair of eyes could recognize it, and his mother acknowledges its presence, drawing him closer, stroking his back as he apologizes for ruining what could have been a perfectly normal night.

What she doesn't know is that his head is screaming, struggling to process everything that's happening and think whether it's worth losing his only friend.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> trust me, this was way better when i wrote it in my head. and i know this is really long and unedited but this chapter has all the important backstory so if you choose to skip anything you're gonna be missing out on a lot
> 
> hmu on twitter @bambamsgf if you wanna yell at me for being such a bad writer. toodles

Today is Jinyoung's twenty first birthday. But you might not think so when you peep at his current situation. Though the digital clock on his bedside table beams "09/21", there is virtually no sign of a cake, streamers, party poppers and hats... or even a fancy three course meal and glasses of champagne with loved ones, if you're more of the conventional adult-type gathering. Instead, the celebrant is clad in a bathrobe, his hair mussed with gel even if he's not set to leave his hotel room any time soon, and pacing back and forth impatiently, like he's waiting for something. _Or someone, for that matter._

"Aish, Jinyoung! Could you stop walking around like that? You're making me dizzy!" A voice complains from the La-Z-Boy at the far right corner of the suite, the most expensive one in the building, reserved for the most popular food critic in all of Seoul. The person in question comes to a standstill by the glass window that showcases the bright skylights the city has to offer.

"How could I not?" he spats impatiently, resorting to biting at the end of his fingernails to somewhat ease the tension building up inside of him.

"You know what, you're literally taking this whole Jaebum thing way too far. Imagine: you'd rather stay here all evening instead of treat your old pal here to some dinner, just because you're waiting for some stupid phone call." The man with the stocky shoulders and shade of hair that resembles a fresh berry straightens the sleeves of his Yves Saint Laurent jacket. 100% authentic and tailor-made for the one and only Kim Yugyeom, editor in chief of The Seoul Times.

Jinyoung shoots him a glare that's enough to turn him to stone. "You, of all people, would know that it's more than a stupid phone call." He tries looking through his head for more witty comebacks, and realizes he has none. Maybe some more red wine could get his creative juices flowing.

Yugyeom seems intimidated enough, seeing as he knows his best friend of almost half a decade too well to want to get on his nerve during a time like this. "Do you think he'll even remember what he told you? That was, what... five years ago, and to add insult to injury, he was drunk then. Both of you were drunk then. So you could have actually misheard or imagined all of this up."

This was supposed to send him off in a fit of rage, topple some sofas and break some lamp shades like what the temperamental man does when he can't process emotion properly. But, instead, he makes him think. What if Yugyeom was right? What if he wasn't waiting for anything at all, and Jaebum just forgot the promise he had uttered all those years ago that he still foolishly held on to like a child who knew for sure his balloon was going to fly off into the wind?

_No. You'll wait a bit longer. That's what you've been doing with Jaebum ever since you met him anyway. Wait._

Jinyoung has been in love with Jaebum since a few months after his mother gave him explicit orders to stay away from him. It's funny how he's been head over heels (or designer sneakers, you know the trick) for almost a solid three-fourths of his life, yet he couldn't exactly pinpoint what it was that sold him. There was never just one thing to love about him: the list grew longer and longer by the day, there was probably not enough paper on the planet to write all of them down on. From the two tiny moles on the upper hand corner of his left eye, to his uncooperative feet that were both the reason for him tripping clumsily in the hallway and killing it in the football field. He used to make mental notes of it, but it took up too much space in his head he stopped keeping track.

It was the first time he had ever disobeyed his parents, the first time he didn't hang on to every word they said like it was the law, and he thought he could get away with it. His eomma and appa put their complete trust in him, their only son, their pride and joy. So, they never suspected anything when he said he was spending the night at a friend's place (he was at Jaebum's) or needed money to pay for miscellaneous school expenses (he used them to buy a birthday present for Jaebum) or went on dates with actual girls who had strict fathers that didn't allow him to bring them to his place and introduce him to his parents (he was having dinner with Jaebum).

Until, he eventually got caught when he was sixteen. Jinyoung had accidentally swapped shirts with Jaebum after soccer practice, which he only ever joined for him even if his hand-eye coordination was good for absolutely nothing. As expected, his mother flipped shit when she found a jersey in the laundry that read Im in bold letters instead of the expected Park. It would be of no relevance to get into detail when it comes to the harsh words that were exchanged, and the blows the boy had to take from his father, who was livid his face had turned red and wouldn't subside until later on that night. Eventually, it ended with him being disowned and on a bus ride to his aunt's house not far away with only two suitcases of all his possessions, which were actually quite a lot.

Nothing really turned for the better when he got there, as his aunt--who had no family to call her own, except the three cats that never failed to remind Jinyoung of his childhood nickname--looked at him with permanent distaste after finding out why he was suddenly going to be under her custody. So, in short:

1\. He was alone and unwanted by every member of his immediate family.  
2\. He was relentlessly bullied by everyone once word spread about why he got kicked out of the house.  
3\. He didn't even have enough money to make it through high school.

But, it was Jaebum and his powerful influence that swaggered to the school authorities and negotiated with them, so they would allow Jinyoung to stay in exchange of community service every weekend.

It was Jaebum who looked for him when he bailed on Chem to go cry in the hallway like the baby he was, on the day he found a piece of paper reading "FAGGOT" in angry print stuck to his jacket.

And it was Jaebum who told him that he was still his best friend no matter what, and that it was such a relief because having a gay best friend to be around would make it easier to tell someone that he was gay as well.

It was always Jaebum: sweet, reliable, devilishly handsome Jaebum.

Which is why, Jinyoung is just so fucking desperate for him to be the one at the other end when his phone rings. When he hears his ringtone fill the entire room, the situation is this: Yugyeom is jumping up and down, screeching "MOVE IT, FATASS" at the top of his lungs, while Jinyoung's pushing him away and threatening to slit his throat if he doesn't shut up. A perfect representation of their relationship.

Of course, Jinyoung also shakily reaches for the phone, which falls at the other end of the counter, since he's such a klutz. But when he finally gets his hands on it and presses the 'Answer' button, he mutters a shaky "Hello?"

"Happy birthday, Jinyoungie! Dab boii OHHHHH!"

Fuck. It's just Bambam.

He can hear Yugyeom face palm himself from the other side of the unit. The disappointment is that audible.

"Ugh, it's just you." He means for it to sound like a joke, something Bam has been on the receiving end of since they were in high school, but now it just sounds bitter. Like a remark telling him to go away and never come back.

Of course, he won't take this sitting down. "What do you mean it's just me? Are you forgetting you're speaking to the Bambam, the king of everything, the lord of the dab? Dab boi dab boi dab boi OHHHH!" Jinyoung can actually feel the line going shaky because of his friend's non-stop movements, something he picked up from Vine a couple of months ago and was obviously unable to control before he took over the entire rational part of his head.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Thanks, Bam." he replies, pursing his lips.

"So, how have you been lately?" He feels his eyes roll into the back of his head. Of all times this boy could have chosen to strike a conversation with him with the intention of catching up, it really had to be when he was waiting for a phone call from the love of his life. How charming.

"Bam, do we really have to catch up now?"

He gasps from the other end, as if insulted, when he isn't really. He's always been slow on jokes, the last one to get the punchline, the kind to laugh his ass off when everyone else has forgotten that a pun was actually made. "Well, of course. A designer rarely gets free time these days."

This statement makes Jinyoung's ears perk up in enthusiasm. "You're a designer now?"

"Well, close enough. I'm assistant to the designer, hehehe. But Jisoo-sunbae is very supportive of what I want to be, always giving me tips on how to be just like her and letting me do all the hard work instead. I think I actually have a chance here." Bambam replies.

He wasn't really the best of students when he was still in school, never the type who seemed like he had any direction in life. Bambam often excused himself to go to the loo and would later on be caught at the bingsu parlor across the street, and shotgun career assessment tests only to end up being a farmer. Seeing him actually succeeding in his field of interest was enough to send a smile across Jinyoung's face.

"That's actually really good to hear, you salmon roll." he replied, with reference to his bright pink head of hair, something he only saw on social media as they haven't seen each other in person since graduation.

"But, enough about me. How are you doing, birthday boy?" Bam says, changing both the topic and his tone. "Are you out and about right now? With Jaebum, by any chance?"

"Psh, why would I be with Jaebum? You and I both know we haven't even seen each other since what... high school?"

There's a sigh on the other end. "Well, knowing you, you love him so much you might have travelled halfway across the world if you wanted to spend your birthday with him, am I right?"

Jinyoung's face flushes at the accusation, but he can't bring himself to say more than "Aish, shut up!" that comes out quite halfheartedly.

"Okay, but you didn't deny it."

Finally, he gives up, slumping into the La-Z-Boy beside Yugyeom, who was grown preoccupied with his phone and chose not to eavesdrop on a conversation between two old friends. "Ah, what's the use? I think everyone knew it back in high school, hopefully besides him."

"At last, you speak the truth! But seriously, how were you..." Unfortunately, a triumphant Bambam gets cut off when an incoming call from none other than Im Jaebum himself flashes on Jinyoung's phone screen.

All of a sudden, he's pressing buttons and slapping Yugyeom and receiving orders to put it on speaker. This is exactly what's he been waiting for, yet he wasn't even close to prepared for the conversation that was to come. He lets his index finger linger for a moment above the 'Answer' option before finally submerging himself to his death.

"Jinyoungie?"

The voice on the other end is exactly like how he remembers it: the vocal equivalent of melted chocolate, rich and velvety and maybe even sweet but Jinyoung is shit with metaphors and just wants to hear more of it.

"Uh, is this Park Jinyoung? Not the creepy male idol though. This isn't him, right? Or else it would be totally embarrassing to have let him hear that."

Even if his body systems have effectively shut themselves down, Jinyoung manages to spit out a "Jaebum-ah! Hey, it's me. Your Park Jinyoung, not the creepy idol."

Yugyeom almost bursts into laughter at how Jinyoung addressed himself, which only grants him a kick in the shin.

"Ah, thank God!" He could practically feel him smiling as he speaks, and he could imagine him losing his eyes because of the immense amount of joy building up in him. "Did you know I had to call four classmates just to get your number back? Because you wouldn't believe my luck. Just last week, I accidentally flushed it down the toilet, could you believe my stupidity? I was taking a shit, and I swear to God I felt something slide down my pocket but I didn't even bother checking. Then, I flush and notice the toilet's having a hard time and when I look down in the water, boom. My fucking 6S."

Jinyoung loved that. How he talked like no time had passed, like they were just two best friends trying to live off each other the day before.

"Why do you always get involved in mishaps like this?"

"What do you mean?" Jaebum gets worried by now, probably thinking of whatever receipt he's planning on pulling out now.

"The day we first met, dummy! You were peeing in my secret hiding place, and when I saw you, you were so shocked you left your penis out. On full display." Jinyoung re-tells. There are crinkles by his eyes when he's talking now, it's always been a sign he's genuinely happy.

"Well, no wonder you're gay." _You have no idea._

Jinyoung pretends he isn't screaming like a mad man deep within, and retorts with "Is this why you called? To have some... toilet talk with me?"

"You haven't changed one bit, have you? Taking any opportunity to use a pun on me?" Their conversation is literally going nowhere, like they're two drunkards who met up at a pub even if it's eight in the morning where Jaebum is and he's supposed to be at work.

"Not at all. I'm still the old me: devastatingly handsome, rich, famous." _Hopelessly in love with you_ , he almost says. Good thing he still has some sense knocked into him.

"Happy birthday, my grumpy cat." Jaebum finally says. While Yugyeom is being extra and moonwalking across the room, rejoicing that his ship is finally saying, Jinyoung tries and keeps his cool, making his way to his bed. "Thanks, Jaebum. It's good to hear from you again. How have you been?"

"I've been good. Manhattan and Seoul are practically alike in terms of the weather, and there are a few Koreans working with me in our headquarters so I haven't had much trouble adjusting. The only problem I have is me constantly having to speak in English. My dad has been pressuring me since he brought me here. Guess I haven't been doing so well."

He could listen to Jaebum rave on about his life forever, he actually memorizes a good chunk of his life story. Totally not creepy. Apparently, the pee-splashing boy he met that one recess time was actually the heir to a multi-million dollar empire: one day, he'd have five-star hotels and three-Michelin star restaurants to his name and his father wanted to make sure that when that came along, he'd be absolutely ready for it. Which is why he couldn't take his son's obvious incompetence in learning the English language.

"Well, that sucks. You'll get the hang of it though: you can do anything. I didn't know a word of English when we were kids, you know this. But I get by because I need it for my job."

"If you're as good as you say you are, maybe you could teach me when I come over next week?"

He almost jumps up on his bed in excitement but Yugyeom has already beat him to it, clapping a hand over his mouth so he won't end up squealing. "What the hell, are you for real? Why the sudden visit?"

"This is going to be a totally weird question, maybe even borderline creepy." he admits. "But by any chance, do you remember our graduation night? At the back of my dad's pick up truck? We were really drunk and I remember telling you that if you're still available by the time you're 21, I want you to disentangle our strings from whoever our soulmates are and tie them with each other?"

Jinyoung sees his friend body rolling in a triumphant fashion from the corner of his eye, and he's trying so hard to restrain himself from doing the same. He'd been playing out the many ways this scenario could have played out in his head, like a lovestruck teenager, but he never thought of actually hearing those words in real life. _Does he want to be soulmates too?_

"Uhm, yeah." he says after a long pause filled with nothing but static. He hopes to God Jaebum doesn't coat his obvious nervousness with malice. "Why? Do you want me to do that when you get here?"

"No, silly."

Jinyoung's a pretty good writer himself but he can't even string enough metaphors to compare how hearing Jaebum say that felt like. First, he was going for the simple dart to the heart. But it was slowly escalating to the pain of a million stab wounds, or a gun shot to the head. 

"I'm actually getting married."

Or like an elephant had stepped on him, flattening his internal organs, or feeling the weight of Taipei 101 on his ribcage. It hurt in several places, and it made his head whirl but he was forced to push on like it was the most normal thing in the world.

Incapable of normalcy, he casually falls off his bed loudly, while Yugyeom faints.

"Whoa, are you okay over there? Sounds like you fell over twice." Jaebum asks over the phone, his voice raising in concern.

"Oh no, it was just the... uh, cat." he replies.

"Jinyoungie, you're allergic to cats."

Seems the universe doesn't think he's humiliated enough and finds ways to draw more bullshit from his mouth. "Well, this one's hypoallergenic. Isn't that right, Kitten?" Since the cat is just a figment of his imagination, he gives the phone over to Yugyeom, who gives a semi-satisfying meow.

"Okay... Anyway, I'm getting married. I found a great guy; well, I mean, my dad did. But, I'll tell you more when we get there." The fact that he can feel Jaebum smile even if he's on the goddamn phone is enough to make him want to combust.

"W-we?"

"Yeah, dummy. How else are you going to check if we're soulmates?"

Jinyoung finally pieces everything together, and comes to the conclusion that his ass is probably just being used by the great love of his life, to check if he's actually compatible with the love of his life. Nothing gets more tragic than this. "Sure thing."

"I'm sorry if I dumped this all on you on your birthday. Hope I didn't interrupt your celebratory dinner with all my talking." Yugyeom shoots his friend a disappointed look, thinking about what could have been a very good night out.

"No, I'm fine! Perfectly fine. Totally, perfectly, extremely, excruciatingly fine! Not a pickle out of place here, no sir. Jinyoung is doing fine. I, Park Jinyoung, am doing fine." He can't keep his trap from babbling on, even if he's already getting slapped on the shoulder. Great. Now, Jaebum's even more weirded out by him. Or so he thinks.

"You've always been the weird fellow between the two of us. That's why I love you. Happy birthday again, Jinyoungie. See you in a few."

And everything is silent again.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i saw this tweet on my timeline that was like "jinyoung when jaebum isn't around: talks about him, cries over him, kisses his fan
> 
> jinyoung when jaebum is around: jb? who is that?" and it perfectly fit my story this is it fam THIS IS IT!
> 
> also sry if it doesn't live up to your expectations school starts in a little more than a week for me and i'm a bit frantic... but thank you to those who left kudos and comments like wtf this is going to be such a big cliche but it keeps me going! hope you leave more of em, if you're feeling generous!!
> 
> hmu on @bambamsgf if you wanna square up and fite me

_"Pass me one more bottle, please Jinyoungie," Jaebum says for maybe the tenth time that night. But then again, who's counting when he and Jinyoung are drunk as hell, visions spinning and limbs splayed out in the back of his brand new pick-up? It's the night of their graduation, and instead of holding celebratory dinners with their respective families, being paraded to different members of the family like they put the fucking moon in the sky, they're stuck here. Two outcasts: one with parents too busy running an enterprise to send anything more than a box with keys to a truck and a bland letter of congratulations, and another with an aunt too reviled by his existence to even ask where he was headed at such a late hour._

_Jinyoung obliges, trying to reach for more soju in the cooler conveniently placed at his feet but his body parts don't seem to be working with his brain. He's never really been a friend of alcohol-it always seemed to dull his mind and make him appear even more stupid than he actually was-until Jaebum said he needed someone to drink his problems away with._

_Jaebum sees him struggle, smirks and helps himself up like a sober person would as he gets it for himself. "You're such a weakling." This comment earns a half-hearted punch in the shoulder from the guy at the receiving end._

_"Says the guy who looks like he's about to cry every time I ask him why we're drinking so much tonight."_

_Almost at once, he loses the sparkle in his eyes, stops talking altogether and proceeds to slump against the tire propped against the window in case of emergencies. It sort of throws Jinyoung off course: he's never seen his best friend this dismayed in all their years of companionship. The closest instance he could think of was when he had lost the science fair back when he was eleven, because his paper mache volcano had crumbled down before he could even show it off to the judges. Jinyoung had been there, of course, telling him the only motivational words that seemed to surface in his head: "Every disappointment is always an excuse to go get some ice cream."_

_He's never really been the best at them, but they somewhat comforted the young boy, who was holding back angry tears, fists balled up and sitting precariously on his lap like he was going to knock someone out anytime. But now, it's like there was nothing that could lift his spirits._

_"Hey," he reaches out to touch his shoulder comfortingly. "Do you wanna talk about it?"_

_Jaebum shrugs and takes another swig of his soju. Clearly not._

_"Is it that bad that you can't even tell Jinyoungie about it? I mean, I just want to help." He's not entirely sure if he could, though, since everywhere he looks is spinning and there's this unusual sensation burning in his throat like he had just swallowed a pint of gasoline._

_There's a long period of no talking: everything between them has settled to such a quiet hum that he can hear crickets chirping in the distance and leaves rustling at the expanse not too far away from the pick-up they're in. Jinyoung has almost accustomed himself to the fact that he's not gonna be able to force anything out of the person across him. Maybe there are some things that aren't even shared to best friends, or brothe- scratch that, he didn't want their relationship to be restricted to something platonic. Maybe there wa-_

_"I'm leaving for New York tomorrow."_

_Jinyoung's train of thought was interrupted so suddenly, with an announcement that took him by the shoulders and threw him out into the road, that he literally felt a pang in his chest. "I've known this for a while now, in case you were going to ask. I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier. All the while, I thought that it wasn't anything to worry about, something that didn't involve you. But now that it's already happening in less than like, twelve hours, I guess it does."_

_There's more of the no talking featured previously, but now there are a lot more tears, coming from Jaebum. A slideshow of sorts replay in Jinyoung's brain of how he's been acting lately, and it all makes sense, how he's been so... out of it lately. The puffy eyes he noticed during homeroom last Tuesday, the last minute requirements he forgot to pass, teachers calling his name repeatedly as he stared into space during recitation. Every time Jinyoung tried pointing it out or raising his concerns, it was always attributed to a lack of sleep brought about by this family problem he didn't wish to expound on any further. Dad's just rearranging some of the divisions of the company, he said. He's taking it out on me because I'm the heir to all this, he said. It will all be over anyway, he said. Turns out they were actually playing a game of 2 Truths and 1 Lie._

_"Why didn't you tell me?" is the first thought that lingered in Jinyoung's head that makes it out of his mouth. He's crying now, almost uncontrollably, and he hiccups between almost every word. Finally sinking in that he'll quite possibly never see Jaebum again. Not until he's settled in New York, or he has enough money to go there for himself. He has no idea which could possibly come first._

_He shrugs, "I didn't know how to tell you without breaking my heart." Jinyoung, on the other hand, struggles to form an opinion without screaming his head off. One day, that would end up being a tattoo across his back. But as of now, that's not the issue._

_Jaebum replaces the bottle of soju in his hand with a fresh one, and he's scared that he had been actually been planning to die of alcohol poisoning before his father could ship him off to the other side of the world. He gathers the remaining strength in him and tries to grab it away, which only earns him a shove in the chest._

_"What do you me-"_

_"Because if there is anyone whose heart is truly breaking, it's mine._

_Because I'm the one who's in love with you._

_I'm the one who's been in love with you since we were kids._

_And I'm the one who's faced every day looking forward to a possible future with you and have it all taken away by some... bullshit company expansion that requires me to be so fucking far away from you for such a long time._

_And I've never been far away from you for long, and I think there's actually a reason why. Because, I can't."_

_At this point, Jaebum's face is directly in front of Jinyoung's, who looks absolutely stunned as he tries to simultaneously take in both what he's seeing and hearing. Too much to process for such a fragile human being such as him. He feels like he's ready to burst. The smell of alcohol on his breath is so overpowering and there are beads of sweat going down the corner of his head, but Jinyoung has never wanted to kiss the living daylights out of him more than he wants to now._

_Now, he has one of two choices:_

_1\. Tell him he's always felt the same way. Or maybe even more than that. Jinyoung's love for Jaebum consumed him like fire would to a piece of paper, and has been doing so for the most part of his life. (But, Jaebum's drunk and probably won't even remember this, he thinks)_

_2\. Make the situation entirely awkward by throwing up in front of him and probably changing his mind about wanting to be with him. (Will he still love me in the morning, he thinks)_

_But before he could even think of what to do, Jaebum's talking again. "And the other problem is that soulmate thing. What if you actually have a soulmate of your own? What if you want to be with her... him instead? I mean, even if I had a soulmate that wasn't you, I'd still choose you, for fucks sake. But, what if that's not how you feel?"_

_"I love you, I always have." He says without thinking, and just like that, a huge load is lifted from his chest. He's been carrying it around like a fucking burden since he was five, the secret eating him from the insides and now that it's free and lingering in the air, he can't help but breathe a sigh of relief._

_Jaebum smiles, like he knew, he goddamn knew all along and he was just waiting for this moment to happen and affirm his suspicions. But it only lasts temporarily as reality washes over him like a wave and reminds him of his impending fate. He pulls the younger boy into a hug, buries his head in the crook of his shoulder and the familiarity of it all and how he doesn't know when he's going to experience this again makes him cry. "Ah, life." He repeats it again and again, like saying it repeatedly would give them more time together._

_"Tell you what, tell you what," Jaebum says, finally deciding to rest his head on his lap. "When you're twenty one, I'll come back for you."_

_Jinyoung resembles a deer in the headlights, as he feels Jaebum caress his cheek the way he's always dreamed of. Of course, his head is buzzing with question and of course, he'd know better than to trust someone who's had too many bottles of soju. But, the next sentence Jaebum tells him takes away all reasoning._

_"I'll come back for you, and I'll take you with me and we'll live in New York. And you'll do me one favor and tie the red strings at our ankles to each other because God, I really just want to be with you."_

Jinyoung feels something like a spark of electricity go down his spine, and suddenly he's awake in a pool of his own cold sweat. _Fuck, I dreamt of him again?_ The last time this happened was on the night Jaebum had called, and though he had a strong feeling it was going to be a recurring one for days to come, but he had managed to distract himself with the growing pile of workload by day that he'd come home, equal parts exhausted and bloated that he didn't have the willpower to see things in his sleep. 

Being the most renowned food critic in South Korea has its perks, he thinks, as he uses his job as an excuse to stress eat without having to pay for anything. So even if his schedule entails him to restaurant hopping for the first three days of the week and revising articles for the remaining two, Jinyoung marches off on all five days--regardless of the puzzled looks he gets from his bosses--whilst promising to make up for the work that needs to be done, and drowns himself in all the wine his system can hold before he passes out and Yugyeom has to be called to collect him. The delicious way to self-destruction, so it seems. 

He rushes to the bathroom immediately and tries to snap himself out of it, splashing water on his face as if that'll drag him back to reality. 

That the man he's loved for so long, told him he loved him back and promised to come back for him was magically getting married to someone else. 

But, it wasn't working. The seas would have to run dry before he came to terms with this particular fact. 

He grabs a towel off the rack and uses it to dab his face dry, as he plops down on the chair right next to his bed. Instinctively, Jinyoung reaches for his phone only to be greeted by a new message. 

From Jaebum. 

Hey, pal. Just in case you forgot (though I don't really know why you would) (would you), I'm dropping by tomorrow. Of course, I expect your ass to be there at GMP waiting for me by 10am sharp. See you, my favorite. 

He knows he's already late, seeing as he overslept without even bothering to check when exactly he was supposed to meet the great love of his life and the snake who snatched him away. But, he turns to the clock anyway in hopes of sparking any emotion at all in him. Drat, it's half past nine. 

As if summoned by his thoughts, there are suddenly three knocks on his door followed by a frantic "Jinyoung!". He knows for sure that it's Yugyeom, who's been coming back to his suite for the past three days to try and get him out of bed. He's failed so far, seeing as Jinyoung hasn't really been prepared for any human interaction since the night he literally kicked his friend's arse out of his crib. 

He opens the door quite hesitantly, only to reveal the biggest smile of relief spreading across Yugyeom's face. It quickly contorts into one of confusion though, as he sees the person expected to be at the terminals in thirty minutes flat is wearing pajamas with fluffy bunnies on them. 

"I'd like to think that you didn't forget that you were picking him up and just decided to make a bold fashion statement, yes?" His outfit totally contradicted Yugyeom's, who looked like a million bucks with his crisp white button down, ripped jeans and sneakers. 

"You don't talk to me properly for almost a week and these are the few words you say to me. Absolutely brilliant, what did I do to deserve you?" 

"Nothing, especially because I'm gonna be the one driving your ass to the airport even if you didn't ask me." 

"Are you kidding? That's supposed to be a given." 

** 

In ten minutes flat, both of them have stormed out the doors and into Yugyeom's top down convertible waiting impatiently in the hotel parking lot. Jinyoung grabbed the first thing he saw in his closet, which was tragically a shirt with Bart Simpson's face on it that he nicked from Universal Studios Japan during a visit almost half a year ago. It had reminded him of Jaebum then, and his weird obsession of sorts with the yellow cartoon character, whom he had once claimed "spoke to him on a spiritual level" when they were kids. Little did he know that it would be of great use when he was getting dressed to meet him after more than a decade. 

Jinyoung's silent for the whole ride there, which is unusual. Most of the time, he's seen screaming that the station be changed to something that isn't playing cheesy love songs for the 90s, or complaining that the A/C is messing up his hair. But this time, he's pensive, seen twiddling his fingers and staring into space. 

"Okay, you know what? Something's up." Yugyeom screams through Shinhwa's vocals. They're turned up so loud they earn dirty looks from other cars driving past them in the highway, but he doesn't care. "I've been playing Perfect Man, a song you absolutely _abhor_ and you're not even reacting." 

"Eh, I'm just... nervous." he replies, not his eloquent self at the moment. 

Yugyeom leaves it at that, and doesn't disturb him for the rest of the way there unless it's to say "Don't get too lost in that head of yours. We only have a half hour left to Gimpo." 

He wishes he could brush every thought away like lint on his jacket sleeve, but they only seem to multiply by the minute. _Will Jaebum be the same towards him? Will anything change because of the marriage, or will they still be best friends? Will the fucking guy even want him to be in his fiancee's life? Can I die for two hours then wake up when I'm ready?_

Sooner or later, the sights around him grow familiar until he sees the airport looming in front of them. He's been here several times in the past, seeing as his work occasionally provides him the luxury of going abroad, so it's probably the only time he's dropped by that he has felt very uneasy. By the exit, there are several relatives running into each other's arms, lovers trapped in tight embraces and others waiting by the gates. Yugyeom leaves Jinyoung to do it by himself, joking that he's only a notch higher than a chauffeur but gets not even a smile. 

Jinyoung's tapping his fingers against the metal bars that separate him from the arriving passengers, and constantly checking his wrist watch as if he's counting down to his impending doom. But, one set of five minutes pass by after the other and sooner or later, it's a quarter past ten and still Jaebum is nowhere to be found. He whipped out his phone to see if he got any text messages, then ended up checking if he actually was supposed to show up _today_. He turns around to look at Yugyeom, who's just as impatient as he is and suggests he calls him up to see if anything is wrong but before he could even dial the number he's already memorized like the back of his hand... 

"Hey, you." 

There's this internal debate if he should make a run for it and tell Yugyeom to step on the pedal, or turn around and face what he's been fearing for the past few days but he chooses the latter, of course, and he's surprised by how Jaebum is equal parts the same and different but still straight up the most beautiful boy in the entire world. 

"I'm sorry if I came late. We couldn't find our luggage and it turns out tha-" He's interrupted when Jinyoung instinctively wraps his arms around his neck. There's a feeling of warmth pressing into his chest, and he feels the weight of all his problems melt into his shoes like they're practically non-existent and it's when he realizes that this is home. This is the home he's come to know and will forever acknowledge as such, and it's good to finally be here again. 

_He still smiles with his eyes, and can't be bothered to gel his hair into place, but now he's put on a bit more muscle and grown a few inches taller. He's absolutely perfect, and he's so glad he gets to experience him all over again._

Jaebum pulls away first, and it makes his heart quiver a bit but he chooses to brush that off for now, because damn is he the happiest he's been in years. He looks down at his feet, and there it is: the string tying their two ankles together. It's discolored and a bit frayed around the edges, but still in place. 

"You should really stop explaining things that don't really require an explanation." Jinyoung says. It comes out harsher than intended for the first words he's uttered to him in person in _years_ so he follows it up with a "It's fine. I didn't even have to wait long, and even if I did, I still would." 

"You missed me, didn't you?" he taunts in his signature tone, and oh my God, his voice is the vocal equivalent of melted chocolate. 

Jinyoung crosses his arms and pulls off his grumpy cat face, much to the other boy's amusement as he cracks up with a laugh that bathes the whole world in sunlight. He joins in and soon they're cackling like maniacs, with passersby giving them weird looks and walking away from them faster than normal. But that's the thing. They don't care, they _never_ cared about anything together. 

When the laughter has died down, Jinyoung's about to offer to carry his luggage to the car when suddenly, a high-pitched shriek pierces through his ears, somewhat resembling the sound of fingernails on a chalkboard. He peeks behind Jaebum's head to find a man beaming like a kid given a free lollipop: charmingly naive but still undeniably beautiful, and he sees that Jaebum looks at him like he hung the moon in the sky. 

He runs towards both of them, and Jinyoung initially assumes that he's going to give Jaebum the most dramatic of hugs like what goes down in most chick flicks (blame Yugyeom for his expertise in this particular genre of movies) and almost turns to look away when he feels yet another pair of arms around his neck and _oh my god Youngjae is hugging him his sworn fucking enemy whom he wants to take down before he gets married to his great love is hugging him penetrating his personal space someone get him away get him away get him AWAY from him_

He doesn't feel like it would be a wise move to push him away like he had the plague, so he lets the uncomfortable feeling linger for a few seconds. Jaebum glows with pride in the background, like he senses Jinyoung's suffering and wishes to make a laughing stock out of his reaction, and finally Youngjae breaks contact but doesn't lose even a bit of his smile. 

"Hi, I'm Youngjae, and I'm gonna be your new best friend!" 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm super drained of all creative juices which explains how crappy this chapter really is but i hope it suffices!! also someone who's not from got7 is making a really small special appearance here and you have to sniff him out to find him but whatever it wasn't that important i just hope you stan the group he's in
> 
> hmu on @bambamsgf if you wish! comments and kudos are greatly appreciated, you guys leaving them (and even the ones just reading this) are the salt of the earth, i love u people!!

"Wait, excuse me?" The silence is almost tangible for a while, so much so that anyone could just reach out and touch it with their bare hands, and Jinyoung chooses to break the eerie lack of noise with that particular question. Youngjae's soft smile turns into something that resembles a frown, though it's almost impossible for someone so happy, so full of life, to express something even close to sadness. On the other hand, Jaebum and Yugyeom don't bother hiding their surprise.

Youngjae decides to try it again, hoping that the second time's the charm and says, "I'm your new best friend, silly!" while pulling a stunned Jinyoung into a hug. This makes the tension between them build up even more, and Jinyoung could practically feel himself about to light on fire.

Yugyeom scratches the back of his neck and tries to explain on behalf of his friend. "Jinyoung is just really surprised by what's happening at the moment. In fact, he fell off the bed when he heard that Jaebum was getting married, don't you know?" (Of course, like any given object Yugyeom tries to fix, he manages to make it worse than it is already.)

Jaebum breaks into a smile, and accusingly points at him. "I knew it! That's why the cat story seemed so hard to believe! You _did_ fall off the bed!" But seeing as his comment didn't seem to make the scenario before him any less awkward than it was, he goes for the easy route. "Choi Youngjae, this is my best friend since... forever, at least, Park Jinyoung. Park Jinyoung, this is my fiancee, Choi Youngjae."

Youngjae seems even more ethereal up close, so it seems, which is absolutely unfair since he came fresh out of a flight from New York. He seems blessed with a perfectly proportioned face, dashed with eyes that sparkle at will and a smile that literally radiates enough light to see in a pitch dark room. He doesn't deserve Jaebum, and he needs to be teared down at all costs but Jinyoung doesn't know if he has the heart to break such a beautiful boy.

"I'm so excited to finally meet you!" Youngjae says a little bit louder due to the rush of more passengers arriving at the waiting area. "Who's your lovely friend right there?" he asks, gesturing towards Yugyeom, who seems totally out of it as he ends up people watching. Typical.

Jinyoung steps on his foot a bit, causing him to jump a little and realize that he is actually in a public place with actual people who expect him to interact with him. "Jaebum, Youngjae, this is Kim Yugyeom. He's the editor in chief of The Seoul Times." He beams with pride upon mention of his title, an impossible feat to achieve at just nineteen years old that he managed to snag for himself. Contrary to popular belief, despite his personality that seems to fit that of the typical dumb sidekick seen in most television shows, Yugyeom has always been gifted. 

He managed to skip most grade levels, until he ended up in college at one of South Korea's most prestigious universities at age fourteen. A bright future in the fields of law and medicine were considered for someone with his mental capacity, but like every child who is forced to participate in something against his will, he ended up rebelling against his parents and taking up journalism. It seemed to pay off in the end though, as he makes the most money out of anybody who works in that institution and has managed to get himself a crew of people much older than he to work for him, Jinyoung included. Though they absolutely hated each other at the get-go, Jinyoung not being able to accept that he was outbested by a fucking nineteen year old, they ended up being the best of friends after a drunken night that involved Yugyeom getting his first sip of alcohol and throwing up in Jinyoung's bathroom.

Youngjae shakes his hand politely, happy to make his acquaintance, but a sly smirk makes its way across Jaebum's face. "Just... your editor?" he asks, trying to coat their close relationship in malice. It obviously makes Yugyeom uncomfortable, and Jinyoung looks like he's about to die.

"Of course!" They shout at the exact same time.

"I'm not gay at all!" Yugyeom manages to add. He feels he says it a bit too desperately, seeing as he's standing before a gay couple and has a gay best friend doting beside him, and instantly takes it back with a, "Not that there's anything wrong with being gay. Seeing that you're both gay. Long live the gays, am I right?"

As previously mentioned, every situation that Yugyeom is in manages to get even worse than it already was once he speaks. People say there is an extremely thin line between being a genius and a madman, and Jinyoung feels his friend crosses that way too often.

Youngjae clears his throat and proceeds with the next item of concern. "Ever since I met Jaebum, he's always told me about you. Especially your power to see the invisible string of fate and tie people together!"

_Great, only that aspect of him is worth telling to other people._

"Yeah, I do. I've had that since I was a kid, I got it from my mom." Jinyoung says flatly. He tries to put a little more... life into his voice, for the lack of a better term, but he seems really zapped of energy at the moment. The only struggle left is how to not let it show as much.

"That's wonderful!" Youngjae replies, genuinely enthusiastic over something so miniscule. He pulls Jaebum-who's casually making small talk with Yugyeom (who will for sure, end up putting Jinyoung in a bad light)-towards him and shakes his ankle a bit. "Do you see any string right now? Is it connecting us?"

In Jinyoung's line of work, he doesn't have the luxury of pretending. He can't sugarcoat his opinions on anything that makes his way to his table: if it's crap, it's crap and he'll have to tell the chef straight up to prevent any false hopes of a five-star review on tomorrow's papers when the foie gras they served is just one notch higher than literal shit. But here, well he thinks he can afford a little bit of playing around.

Jinyoung pretends to squint and find any trace of yarn between their ankles, pretends to look even the least bit remorseful as he replies, "Oh, I'm sorry. You guys aren't soulmates." and pretends to actually sound sincere in saying, "But, I can surely do something about that."

"Oh, thank you thank you thank you so much!" Youngjae says, offering him another hug, a bit shorter than the first but still with the killer grip around his neck like he has the intention to choke him to death. Jinyoung was never a person who was fond of contact like that, which is too bad that the boy before him is honestly quite the opposite.

Yugyeom seems to do one thing right that morning, and suggests that they should leave before the place is swarming with more people, which Jinyoung would be really uncomfortable with. The remark earns an, "When have you ever been scared of people, Jinyoungie?" from Jaebum, which Jinyoung chooses to ignore as he plops their luggage onto the backseat of Yugyeom's convertible. He has no time for conversations now, not now when every second feels like a step closer to passing out from the burning sensation in his heart.

Once everything has been loaded, the car is almost so full that it takes up the most part of what should have been the backseat. As much as Youngjae and Jinyoung would want to find a place inside, there's no way both of them could fit. It's pretty much a metaphor for who stays and who goes in Jaebum's life, Jinyoung thinks, which is why he's determined as ever to get his ass in that car even if it means having his face squished against the car window.

After numerous attempts that end up in fits of laughter and Jinyoung looking like a blowfish, Jaebum thinks up an alternative solution. "You know, Youngjae and I could always just get a cab. You could give us the address to the hotel and we'll be on our way."

Yugyeom and Jinyoung exchange frantic looks, and the latter is trying to be as subtle as possible that he isn't letting them get any moments together while he's still in the picture. "No!" Jinyoung exclaims a bit too loudly, which causes Youngjae's brows to knit in confusion. "I mean, no. You're our guests! It would be rude if we made you take a cab."

"No, honestly. I wouldn't mind, and I'm sure he wouldn't either." Youngjae replies, interlacing his arm with Jaebum's. It almost makes a vein at the side of Jinyoung's head burst due to stress, but he tries to force himself to calm down.

Jaebum's face lights up with an idea, and knowing him for so long, Jinyoung's aware that they never end up beneficial to any of the parties involved. He remembers one high school party where Jaebum had introduced the concept of dunking a willing volunteer in the beer keg, and Song Yunhyeong having to be surgically removed from it a few moments later.

"What if Youngjae and Jinyoung go on a cab ride together?"

Youngjae squeals at the thought and is holding Jinyoung by the wrist in the blink of an eye. "That's brilliant! I can't wait to get to know more about you!" Suddenly, he's rushing the two others to hurry up and leave so he could have more time to get cozy with his new companion. He brushes off some last minute reminders about where the hotel is and which cartoon character name they're using to check in, which is apparently some sort of stupid privacy policy that Im Enterprises uses, and gets a ride before Yugyeom and Jaebum could even leave.

In less than five minutes, Jinyoung is settled in the back seat of the mustiest taxi he's ever been on with the one person he wants to take down the most. He is very unhappy, but let's not dwell on the obvious.

"You know I wasn't kidding when I said that Jaebum always talks about you." Youngjae says, twiddling with the ring on his finger. Gold-plated, adorned with 24 fucking carat diamonds, with their initials engraved.

"You don't say?" Jinyoung manages to squeak out.

"Yeah. He always tells me about how he has a best friend who's the biggest food critic in South Korea." This manages to put a smile on his face, knowing that he's actually been a topic of their conversations for more than his ability to see the invisible. "Actually, he's told me many things about you."

"Like what?"

Youngjae whips out his right hand and counts how many facts he actually knows on his fingers. "Well, first, you're fond of making this scrunched up grumpy face, which has earned you the nickname Grumpy Cat. Your mom gave you that nickname, which brings me to the second one I know: you're not in good terms with her, or your dad. Sorry for bringing that up."

Jinyoung squirms, and he's not sure if it's because he was reminded of how his mother went from loving him to loathing him over something as simple as his sexuality or because Youngjae knew him to that extent already.

"Third, you're gay as well, but you've never had a boyfriend. Jaebum says it's because you're afraid of commitment. Fourth, once you're mad at someone, you could go for years without talking to them, which is why Jaebummie is always extra careful around you because he knows that he could possibly lose you after one screw-up."

_Jaebum could fuck his life over more times than he could ever count, yet he could never bring himself to close his door on him. His life will forever be a constant cycle of welcoming back into his life like he never left._

"And fifth, you always get what you want. You're headstrong, you're a fighter, you will do anything in your power to get your way." Youngjae's voice quivers a bit, and his next sentence probably gives the reason away. "Which scares me. Just a little bit."

Jinyoung looks at him, eyebrows raised. There's a part of him that wants to warn Youngjae that he hasn't even seen any of the tricks he has up his sleeve yet, but a portion of his being tugs at him, telling him that he shouldn't do him any harm, that he can't even do so much as yell at his face even if he fucking wants to already.

"I'm the total opposite. I'm never up for a fight: I'll let anyone win over me as long as it settles things. I'm always the one to say sorry first, and I don't think I've genuinely frowned once in my life. I'm a relatively happy person, you see." Youngjae tries to explain, but it seems to hurt Jinyoung in more ways than one. Jaebum could have looked for anyone else to marry, heck he could have come back as soon as he turned twenty one because in some parts of the world, people still do hold on to promises, surprise surprise! But he had to look for someone who was actually the complete opposite of who Jinyoung was, like his characteristics were so sickening that he couldn't take even the tiniest bit of similarities to spend the rest of his life with. Go figure.

"Maybe that's why you're so uncomfortable with me?" Youngjae continues. Jinyoung remains silent, but not for the reason he thinks, which makes him prod on with his speech. "I've never really had a sibling. I was an only child, and apparently so was Jaebum, so all my chances of knowing what it felt like to have a brother or sister in my life have been erased. Until, you came, at least. I hope you really find it in your heart to be my friend. You don't have to, of course, but if you want it to, I'd be very happy."

Jinyoung turns to look at him, and it breaks his heart how he's practically pleading to let him into his life. He's never felt this much conflict in a very long while: given other circumstances, if he had met Youngjae at work or bumped into him by accident at a coffee shop downtown, he definitely would have wanted to pursue friendship with him. The boy was a walking ray of sunshine, all smiles and such: who wouldn't want to? But, this is _way_ different.

And with that, upon seeing the hotel in full view in front of him, he taps the cab driver on the shoulder and says, "Please pull up over here."


End file.
